on rambling & saying the wrong thing
tldr; give a fuck what people think but don't let them change you. find your authenticity and all its beautiful quirks. in turn, you'll find your freedom and your people.
i don't really buy the 'i don't give a fuck what anyone thinks about me' mindset. it seems like it is the 'right' thing to say or feel these days in order to prove that we are confident; but we are humans - our brains are wired to crave and seek acceptance. we want to be liked and we want to be a part of something. it's inside of us all.
so i like this version better: giving yourself FULL permission to own your authentic self by not feeling compelled to fit into someone else's expectations of you. i like it because it's not so aggressive, #1 (calm down, right?!) and #2, it puts you in the driver's seat in terms of choice. choosing to care about someone else's opinion of you is not wrong as long as it honors your authenticity (ie: maybe there is a helpful shift to make - if so, right on, man - i accept!).
i'm going to relate this to group fitness because YOU KNEW I WOULD. when i started teaching i had this idea about who i needed to be as an instructor (spoiler, it wasn't 'myself'). i needed to queue perfectly. say the right things all the time. fill the silence with the ideal motivational encouragement. no mistakes. no stumbles. i wanted to impress people. i wanted to be liked. my success was only measured by how people felt about 'instructor hilary' because this would keep them coming back, right?! i strived for this for a long time and oh man, was i wrong.
flash forward to current times. when you take my class i will ramble. i will say the wrong thing and trip over my words. i will laugh at myself when i make lame jokes. i will tell you about my favorite muscles or my plants. i will wholeheartedly encourage you. i will talk to your pets who enter your zoom square (and i will know them by name). this is me. i'm a little awkward and a lot genuine. i love what i do and i celebrate my style 100%.
my classes and the way i teach might not be your cup of tea and that's ok; different strokes for different folks (there i go again). i challenge you to give this way of thinking a try in your life and find a little freedom and very likely, your people.